I had a great conversation with a friend today about the whole notion of "bittersweet"...things that are both good and bad. She had asked me how I felt about my upcoming show and I responded by saying it was either the best thing for me to be doing....or the worst. Truth is....it's both...it's bittersweet.
It's bitter because I wake up many mornings with dozens of things to do and sometimes the chores or the outings take over and the creative projects get pushed to the side. I do, after all, have a deadline looming over me. It's bitter because I'm a fly by the seat of my pants kind of artist and I make mistakes and use the trial and error method...often having to back peddle...or even start over. It's bitter because then I second guess myself and lose confidence. It's bitter because thinking about it all keeps me awake at night. It's bitter because I have too many things I want to try so get distracted and side tracked....and sometimes all I want to do is work on a puzzle.
But...it's also sweet because I love a challenge. I enjoy making an image I have in my mind turn into something I can hold in my hand or hang on the wall. It's sweet because I love playing with paper and fabric....and beads and buttons.
It's sweet because each misstep teaches me something and I love that lightbulb moment when I figure something out or end up with something I actually like....or at least don't hate. It's sweet because making things with my hands brings me joy.
I have a vision in my mind....but I'm still not sure if I'll get there....but I'll probably get close enough to be just fine. "When nothing is certain....anything is possible."
One thing is certain....there will be buttons....how can there not be!
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